53. Overcoming Imposter Syndrome and Unconventional Weddings with Aleisha Camilleri
In this episode of the Money Mindset Hub podcast, I had the pleasure of interviewing Aleisha Camilleri an marriage celebrant who offers unique and light-hearted ceremonies. We discussed Aleisha's recent success in booking weddings, her personal growth and confidence as a celebrant, and her plans for expanding her business and her big five year goals. Aleisha shared her approach to overcoming imposter syndrome, balancing motherhood, running a business, and pursuing studies. We also talked about the importance of booking a celebrant early on in the wedding planning process and creating a memorable ceremony that reflects the couple's personalities. You are definitely going to want to check this one out if you are planning on getting married soon, she is a classic and will give you some brilliant advice!
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Speaker 0 (00:00:02) - Hello, and welcome back to another episode of the Money Mindset Hub podcast. I'm your host, Carla Townsend, and if you're new here, I'm a money mindset success coach for female entrepreneurs who are ready to manifest a financial masterpiece. And today I have one of my beautiful girlfriends, Alicia Kaari, who is here to chat about what it's like being a celebrant. She is a, it's a pretty much, pretty new, right? Pretty new marriage celebrant, but also a mama of two and wife, and all the things as student and employee running her own business. She's doing all the things. And so to give you a little bit of a background, Lish and I actually met back six years ago in Mother's group, which I can't believe that it's actually gone that fast, right? For one, like it's been six years. Um, but honestly, Lish, like my, my life has never been the same without you in it. Like, no, wait. Is that what I'm meant to say? ?
Speaker 1 (00:00:59) - Absolutely. Hey babe. ,
Speaker 0 (00:01:02) - My life has never been the same. Yeah. With you in it. That's what I meant to say. In a good way, right? In a good way. So, um, super, super quick. I'll give a little intro and then I'm gonna pass it over to Lish to share some of her magic and her hilarious humor with you. So she is, she's a marriage celebrant who also offers an MC service for your big day, as well as vow renewals, commitment ceremonies, naming ceremonies. And she's also looking to expand into funerals, memorial services, and also life celebrations. Um, honestly, she's just a dag. She's got no filter. She is who she is. What you see is what you get. Um, but honestly, if you are lucky enough to have her be there on your big day, she's gonna bring it because she provi. She pri she prides herself on delivering a unique but lighthearted ceremony. And honestly, the minute you get to hear her personality, you will, you'll know that she's for you. So if you are in the back, marsh, Ballarat, Geelong, Western suburbs of Melbourne area and roundabout, please be sure to keep listening and check out all the links that I'll put on the show notes to book her, meet her. She's amazing. And I'm gonna hand it over to you. Hey babe.
Speaker 1 (00:02:13) - Hey babe. Long time. Nice. How you doing?
Speaker 0 (00:02:17) - So funny. So currently we're actually doing this at my house. So I'm in my bedroom and is in my daughter's bedroom.
Speaker 1 (00:02:25) - Yep. Ready to,
Speaker 0 (00:02:30) - So I guess let's take it back for everyone who's so new to you, and tell us why, why did you wanna be a celebrant?
Speaker 1 (00:02:39) - Yeah, cool. So, um, I grew up in a very large European family and so for us from a young age, it was the big weddings. Um, you were invited to every second, third, fourth cousin's wedding, right? Um, and the parties were magic. They were just, they were so much fun. There was so much life in them. But of course being from that European family, they were always church ceremonies. Um, which each to their own, everybody does what's right for them. But the issue with the church ceremony for me was that there's just no personalization, right? You don't actually learn anything about the couple. So for me it was just having the ability to, number one, get to gate crash, everybody's wedding, pretty much like I'm a professional wedding crasher. And number two, being able to, um, tell those stories and share those stories of these couples and where they've come from, how they've gotten here. Um, yeah. And that's basically that I just love weddings. I wanna be a part of it. I wanna do it.
Speaker 0 (00:03:39) - Yeah. And honestly, like it is perfect for you. I remember a few years ago now. Yeah. When you started floating the idea of doing it and oh my God, I was like, yes, you have to because you, your personality, you are so infectious. And honestly, as soon as you come into the room you're like, yep, Alicia's here. .
Speaker 1 (00:03:58) - Yeah, yeah, yeah. There's no mistaking it between me and Jake for those playing at home. That's my husband. Between the two of us, you know, when we're there, um, there's, yeah, there's no mistaking when we've stepped into the room, we're a very loud, vibrant bunch. But yeah, I think it was covid, it was, I mean, COVID was the pushing point for me, right? Like we were all sort of sitting around with nothing much to do. Um, and I just had Merf come along and it was like, well, it's the perfect time now to branch out and start actually moving towards, I suppose, doing something that I was gonna start enjoying. I think that was the big thing. And I think Covid was that big eye-opener for a lot of people as well.
Speaker 0 (00:04:36) - Yeah, it definitely was. Yeah. Um, and I mean, you've been killing it. Let's just say that for one, you've been killing it. You've been booking weddings left, right, and center like all the way into next year. Um, how have you found like the, I suppose the whole process, like you've been really putting yourself out there and we're chatting about that a bit earlier, but you've been going to the, the wedding expos and here, there and everywhere, but, but it's amazing to see, like you fully step into this is who I am and this is what I'm here to do and I wanna make all of these couples days the best day possible and just put yourself out there. I feel like you are really magnetizing everyone who is meant for you.
Speaker 1 (00:05:14) - And look, I suppose for me, um, the big thing being in the wedding industry is it's a very seasonal thing. It's not a service that you are selling, it's not the type of service that you can just constantly sell every day. So it gets a little bit difficult there. And for me it was a matter of trying to identify how I could best put myself forward to keep getting those leads. Um, and for me, I had a goal. So, you know, this, you've been, I mean you, Jake, a number of other people, you've all been really instrumental in sort of pushing me to really reach my goals. But my goal was to book 10 ceremonies in a 12 month period. Not necessarily do their ceremonies, but have them booked. September 22 hours was, I was registered December 22, I did my first ceremony. Um, and come June, so six months roughly down the track, um, just a bit over, I will be, I will be actually performing my 10th ceremony.
Speaker 1 (00:06:12) - I've also got an additional eight or nine booked for the remainder of this year with more space to come because couples are booking sort of like only two to three months in advance. So I've got another eight or nine this year. I've got a bunch more book next year. So in the space of about six months, I booked 10 couples. And for me, that was massive for me as someone who really struggled with, um, imposter syndrome number one, I've really struggled also with, um, I'm a procrastinator, like a, like a top level procrastinator, like . If you wanna know a professional procrastinator, come and talk to me. Um, so for someone who struggled with those things, to have reached that, and the way that I've done it is I've looked outside of the wedding services and gone to websites like bark and things like that where you can find couples that are looking for your services and take that initiative where I can get as much, um, as many leads and as many couples as I can in that first 12 months to get my name out there. If I'm not doing it, somebody else will. So
Speaker 0 (00:07:13) - A hundred percent they will. And it's so funny cuz as you were saying, I just wanted to book 10, I'm here smirking because I remember Yeah, I remember our conversation. I was like, and double it . Yes,
Speaker 1 (00:07:25) - Yes.
Speaker 1 (00:07:27) - It was just sort of like, it was just one of those things where I was like, 10, if I can get 10, I would be so happy if I could get 10. And then I remember coming to you and being like, I booked my 10th couple today, and you were like, so double it. Why haven't you doubled it? And I remember sitting here thinking like, when you said that, I was like, I'm not gonna book 20 couples. Like that's a really big number. And man, I have like, including my couples for next year. I have, I'm well and truly on the way to almost tripling my numbers.
Speaker 0 (00:07:57) - Yeah. I think that you've actually began to show yourself what's possible, right? Yeah. You've actually started to show yourself what you really can do and what you're capable of. Yeah. And bit by bit you're stepping into that and you're creating so much more confidence around yourself, your abilities. Like you're getting out there, you're making yourself uncomfortable. Yeah. And you've grown so much, like just in this last six months, you have stepped into really you, and I suppose, like I already saw this side of you, I already saw this confident lakin who loves a good time, has no filter, who's just got such a big heart. I already know that side of you. And so it's beautiful to see you'd be able to put that out there and show the whole world like this is me and these couples are now experiencing, you know, your spin, right.
Speaker 0 (00:08:44) - Leia's spin on things. And I, and I love that because it's just, it's magical. It's magical seeing you do it. And I can't wait to see you keep going bigger and bolder and, and booking like 10 times that many couples, you know? Yeah. However many you want. I I just feel like you can do it all. What you touched on there too, you were talking about like you had that imposter syndrome and that is something that is so, so common. Okay. Like, it is like, I wanna normalize the fact that imposter syndrome is something that every single person feels. It doesn't matter how long you've been in business or whether you're brand new or whether you're thinking about the idea or whether you're pretty seasoned. Sometimes that will come up, it just gets less and less. But how did you sort of overcome those, those fears? Or maybe not even essentially overcome them, but you still move through them anyway. Yeah. What were some of the other fears that were sort of coming up around starting a business and how do you, how do you move through it?
Speaker 1 (00:09:32) - Yeah, definitely. So I think the big thing for me was that I've always been a, I mean, I come from a background where you work and you work hard, right? But for me, um, that work was always the nine to five gig. It was always working for the man, it was, and it was working your ass off to, to benefit somebody else. With that came, you know, there was a certain amount of professionalism that was expected and it was expected in the way that you look and the way that you talk and the way that you act. Um, so I think a big thing for me in terms of the imposter syndrome came around my own personality as well. Finding my own authenticity. Um, I'm a lot, I'm a lot right , like,
Speaker 1 (00:10:13) - Let's just put it out there. I'm a lot. And it was sort of a, well, who really wants that? Who wants that at their wedding? And who wants the tattooed pierce lady to be there? And who, who are you to think that you can do this? Um, it also came around things like having a husband that works shift work and having two kids. It was the guilt around a lot of the mum's stuff as well. I mean, I work Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, um, that brings in the main cash while I'm building up this business. So it was sort of taking time away from them on the weekends and it became a, you know, is this the right thing to do? Is this the right thing for my girls? And it was really just a matter of stepping back and looking at the bigger picture for the short term.
Speaker 1 (00:10:57) - Yeah, it's gonna be hard and it's gonna be a slog, but in the long term my girls are gonna see that. You know, they've got this mom who was able to step outside of her comfort zone. She was able to pay her own way in a business that she really loves doing something that she really enjoys. And in turn, I'm gonna be able to create more time for them as well, right? Like, I can do the drop offs, I can do the pickups. Um, if there's something special at school, it doesn't matter. I can get to that because I'm there. Same deal sort of with the, with looking at who I was as a person and, um, I suppose really starting to understand and acknowledge that people wanted someone like me. Um, a big thing for me at the start was I, I remember at my first ceremony we, I'd gotten to the venue and that morning it, it had rained, right?
Speaker 1 (00:11:50) - Like it had pissed down that morning I woke up at like three o'clock and it was bucketing and I was like, holy shit. Like this is an outdoor wedding, how's this gonna go? And I got there and I'm doing my Instagram story and I'm like, it pissed down this morning. And my dad, like, he called me that afternoon and he was like, you can't talk like that. Like, you need to understand, you need to be professional. And it took me back a step and I sort of thought, fuck, are people gonna wanna book me if they hear that this is how I talk. Like I'm an, I'm a middle class spoken, right? , like, are people gonna wanna book me if this is how I talk? And the more that I saw the people that I was attracting by the way that I spoken, the way that I presented, the more I realized that fuck yeah.
Speaker 1 (00:12:33) - Like I don't need to be scared of this anymore. I don't need to be scared of who I am as a person. People aren't gonna say no to that. People want that, people want me. And it was just, it was a realization for me. It was just stepping out of that comfort zone and out of that, um, I suppose that square of normality, it took effort, but that's what pushed me to really sort of squash down a lot of that imposter syndrome, which is still coming up, right? It still comes up every day. Um, but I have the ability now to stop and say, well, hold on a second. Look at how much you've achieved in six months. Like why stop, why would you stop af like before each expo? It's like, fuck. Like, am I gonna be okay speaking to people today? Like how's this gonna go? And it's like, just go with it. People are gonna, it's gonna be fine. You, you do this daily. Like it's gonna be fine.
Speaker 0 (00:13:22) - Yeah, that's exactly right. And I spoke where good old dad was coming from. It's like that's his own perception of what is professional, his own perception of what a celebrate should be. Yeah. But you are here changing the game. Yes. And he's saying, I'm gonna be the kind of celebrant that's me because that's why people are gonna book me because it's me. And you're proving to yourself that that's exactly what they want. They just want you to be authentic. They just want you to be real. Yeah. And you can feel it. And I know you very, very well. Yeah. And I watch your stories and I read your captions and I'm like, that is you. Yeah. That is your personality. And I love the fact that you're not holding back. Like yeah, the funny stuff. Seriously, I'm gonna tag her Instagram and everything in here cuz you need to go check her out and just have a laugh because of the stuff she shares. But seriously, that is you. That is stuff that you would say to me on the phone or in person that we'd be laughing about and don't
Speaker 1 (00:14:13) - Me wrong. Right? Like, I'm not delusional. I'm not sitting here thinking everybody wants me to be their celebrate because I know that there are gonna people, there are gonna be other couples who want a calmer, um, presence on their day and they want something that's maybe a little bit more traditional. When I sit down to write and I've really connected with a couple, it's so much more fun and I feel like it all just flows so much easier when I feel like I've attracted my kind of couples, my couples that don't care if I say piss in my in my stories, right? They don't care that I'm a little bit too much because they want that little flare that I can give. And I'm not sitting there swearing through people's ceremonies, right? Like I've, I've got a potty mouth, um, and you'll get that from me on my socials. But when it comes to people's ceremonies, you know, I don't do that, but I've got a flare to the way that I write. And when I connect with the couple, it makes so much difference. Like it makes all the difference when it comes to putting their ceremony together.
Speaker 0 (00:15:13) - Yeah. And I mean, we've debriefed after a few of your ceremonies and how it went and you are just so lit up. Like it was, it was exactly what you were supposed to bloody do. And I'm so glad that you just did it
Speaker 1 (00:15:23) - And you know, because I'll call you and I'll be like, what are you doing? I need to go out for a drink. Let's go party. Cause I'm coming down from like this ceremony high where I'm like, I fucking smashed that. Like, we need to keep this party going and I can't do it at their wedding. So like, let's go, let's get a drink.
Speaker 0 (00:15:40) - I know, a hundred percent. But that's the thing, like you are bringing your own fla, your own humor, your own like, yeah, just, just you, you're bringing all of you to their ceremony, but you're doing it with such love and such heart and such connection to them. But you are doing it different. You're actually going through and sharing their stories. And I've seen the feedback that you've been getting, not only from the guests that you have married, but also from their families saying how stoked they were with you, how much they laughed at what you said, how they even learnt stuff about the couples that you are marrying that they didn't even know and they're their family and friends. Yeah. Like that is pretty, that's pretty astounding. It's amazing.
Speaker 1 (00:16:20) - And it's funny, right, because like you introduced me as someone who's quite like, quite humorous and funny and I don't see myself that way. And sometimes I'll write little one liners and I'm like, oh yeah, I wonder if this will hit. And then that will hit. But also like the next couple of lines, people will laugh at I'm like, maybe I am fucking funny, like . But maybe that's actually a thing. Like, it's always really good to be up there in front of people and to get that emotional response.
Speaker 0 (00:16:45) - Yeah. I love that. People who are legitimately funny don't think that they're funny, but it is. It's the things that they say, the way they say it, it's real fast. It's real quick witted and it just comes out and that's, and that's you. That's you to a t. So I guess like, um, let's keep going on a little bit into like the, like the motherhood side as well as trying to run a business and grow a business and all the things. And I mean also studies. So let's talk about that. I know that we've had extensive conversations over the last few years about how we love to put things on our plate, but Yeah. Um, for anyone who is new here, Lish has two beautiful girls and I have three kids, two girls and a boy. So we both have, I guess, experienced this journey together.
Speaker 0 (00:17:31) - Like we met when our eldest daughters who are now six, they were little teeny tiny babies. Yeah. Um, and now here we are like six years later and we've both gone out and built businesses and we're still doing that. Like, we're still in the process of doing that all whilst juggling motherhood. So I wanna get from your point of view how you've found that and any, I guess, tips to moms or soon to be moms that actually wanna have a business. They wanna start that, but the thought is daunting, you know, and we've heard it all like yeah, we understand, you know, it's, it is hard. There is always gonna be a hard, you gotta choose that right? And we understand time is precious and that can be rough. But yeah. In your own experience, I guess, how have you found that
Speaker 1 (00:18:17) - Chaotic? Um, like don't sugarcoat it. Right? I'm not gonna sit here and say this has been the easiest ride of my fucking life because it hasn't, it's it's been chaotic. It still is chaotic. Um, I, like I was joking with, with another, um, another beautiful business woman that I, I met up with her at the ball wedding industry ball on Saturday night and I've done one of her exposed before. Her name's Laura Feldman. She's, she's gorgeous. Um, and we're having a good chat and I joked her and I said, I'm gonna start my own podcast and it's gonna be called, um, over Committed and underprepared. Like I'm a jump in head first kind of person. Um, and so I've got two girls, so Harper and Murphy. Um, and I think it is also important to share that Harper is on the spectrum and also a D H D, right?
Speaker 1 (00:19:09) - So on top of all the additional stresses of motherhood, we've got some additional needs with her that need to be met as well. Um, and like I mentioned before, Jake, who works shift work. So our house is already chaotic. If you walk into our house, nothing's ever in place. Everything is always slightly broken. Um, and it's just, it's nuts. But somehow we make it work. And I think it just comes down to, for me, it's really about the village and the support system. Um, number one, it's the encouragement. So Jake, I'm, I'm really lucky that I've got a husband that is very supportive of everything that I do. Um, he does tell me sometimes just take a step back. Like I think I've approached him with three different business ideas in the last month or two. And he is like, do you think you need to just take a second and focus on what you're working on now?
Speaker 1 (00:20:05) - And then maybe we can explore that in, I don't know, maybe like a year's time. Um, he's always very supportive of everything that I do and we will workshop together how we're gonna make that work between, um, getting the kids looked after and just the general running of the house. Um, on top of that, I've also taken on yes studies. So I'll be starting a bachelor of business in June, which, um, I felt I really needed to expand on what I want to in the next three to five years. Um, and it is just, it's the support system. It's the friends that are there to encourage, it's the family and friends that are there to help you pick up the slack. Um, my sister-in-law is massive in that if I need the kids picked up because I have a wedding, she's there to help out with that.
Speaker 1 (00:20:51) - Um, same with my mom and my dad on weekends. Like I'm lucky that I have that system. So I suppose if you are a mom that's looking to do this, number one, get your village in place. It's not about do you have a village, it's about getting your village. I think that's what's really important mm-hmm. . Because I feel like it would be a really easy roadblock for you to turn around and say, oh, well I don't have these people in my life so I can't do that. You need to find those people. You need to find those life-minded people because that's step one. And you can't find them. You can find them in, you know, you can find them at afterschool pickups. You can find them at day. You can find them at the park for God's sakes. And I'm not saying trust your kid with anybody, right? , I'm definitely not saying that, but I'm saying you need to build up these relationships with people that are close to you and allow them to help you. Um, don't self-sabotage on that. And I think building that, building that village is really the first, the first place, um, in that kickoff I think.
Speaker 0 (00:21:52) - Yeah, for sure. I couldn't agree more. Yeah. And I suppose for, for those like honestly, soon to be new moms for the first time, get into a mother's group. Yeah. And I really hope that you can establish bonds like we have in Mother's Group six years ago and now look at us. Yeah,
Speaker 1 (00:22:10) - Absolutely. And you meet so many beautiful people through, look, you're not gonna always get along with everybody in your mother's group, but you are gonna find beautiful people who help you on every step of your journey. And I don't know, some people I think can think that they're a little bit old-fashioned or, you know, think, what's it gonna give me? It gives you those friendships that you really need. Nobody really understands unless you've been a mother, nobody understands how, um, limiting I guess and how isolating the experience of being a mum is. Whether it's your first time or you've got multiples. If you don't have people around you who have been through that experience, nobody's gonna understand how isolating it is. And so that mother's group, that was a lifesaver with, with harps. And I don't know if you felt the same way. We had friends that hadn't spoken to us in like a, in, in like a long time. And it wasn't until they had kids that they then came to us and said, wow, like we didn't realize we're really sorry, but Mother's group for us, like even for Jake, the dads that he met through this group made a huge difference.
Speaker 0 (00:23:16) - Yeah, no, definitely. It can be such a magical thing. And I guess like when you're going into it with the intention of what you hope to get out of it mm-hmm. , like when you go to it going, Ugh, I just probably should go. Yeah, no, go to it. Be open and really immerse in the fact that you can seriously find some beautiful, lifelong friends in those kinds of groups. And we have, we definitely have. It's helped so much, especially the first time around because you really don't know what you're, you're in for.
Speaker 1 (00:23:43) - Absolutely.
Speaker 0 (00:23:44) - You really don't. And, and I suppose then at the same time, you're going through all the stages together and you're not just doing like motherhood together, but it's also life and it's a big portion of your life. Like
Speaker 1 (00:23:53) - Exactly. I mentioned all my stories earlier today. We've been there through each, like I've been here while you've built up your business, like across the last six years. Like this is a journey that we've been able to go on together as well and that we've been able to cheer each other on with together. Yeah. Um, and it's mother's, like mother's group was, I honestly, it was invaluable. If I could do it all again, I'd 110% like mother's group, mother's group every time Mother's group. I hated, I hated missing a mother's group. If we had to miss one, I'd like it put a downer on my week.
Speaker 0 (00:24:27) - I know. I hated it too because it was just those Friday plays . Yes. It was like, it was like sanity. Yeah. Like you just got some sanity. That's what I found about it. Yeah. Um, so tell me about your goals for the next five years. Okay, so you literally, you touched on it before and you also mentioned it before. We are separated into different rooms in my house, but , but what are your five year goals?
Speaker 1 (00:24:52) - Um, so first of all it's to finish a bachelor of business. I think that's, that's big. Um, so I am currently in the works with a photographer friend of mine who is local to the back of Marsh area as well. Her name is Sarah. Um, her, her tag is s LJ photography. Um, for anybody who's interested in looking at her work, um, we are looking at maybe starting up some, um, the opportunity for micro weddings, um, in the area. So just looking at budget, family options for couples who want something a little bit smaller and intimate. Um, but over the next three to five years, my hope is really to grow that. So my aim is to open up a space where I can hold ceremonies and cocktail hours, um, within sort of this local, local area, somewhere between here and bland. Um, and that's really my goal. I love event planning. I love planning events. It's not just um, the wedding. Like, it's not just the ceremony itself, it's the whole process. Planning is what I love to do. Um, so to be able to run a space like that is where I'm pushing for the next five years.
Speaker 0 (00:26:02) - I can't wait. I can't wait. I think it's gonna be, yeah, it's gonna be pretty, pretty amazing. Yeah. But you've got all that you can tell that you are already, you are so invested into it. Even when you started like flaunting with the idea, you can tell it's just like, just do it. Just just go for it. And
Speaker 1 (00:26:17) - You know when something feels right, like it sparks something in your belly. Um,
Speaker 0 (00:26:22) - . Yeah, it does. It's
Speaker 1 (00:26:23) - Just, and it's like, oh yeah. Like, and it, it just starts to flow. So that is, that's the big aim for the next five years.
Speaker 0 (00:26:30) - Amazing. I love it. Yeah. Alright, so to wrap up, I'm gonna hit you with a couple of questions. Mm-hmm. and just like whatever comes out comes out. I think that it's really important for, um, people to understand when they're booking a celebrant. Like why do they need to focus on a celebrant? So I'm gonna get up a couple of questions that I want to chat about quickly. Cause I just realized like we can talk for Hours Guild
Speaker 1 (00:26:56) - At talking like it's my resume. That is my top skill. Can talk your ear off.
Speaker 0 (00:27:02) - Oh yeah. , same. Alright. You put up a blog post on your website and I loved it and I wanna reference it first and then, you know, spit out you a couple questions from this. So three big reasons why your celebrants should be one of your first vendors that you book first off. Mm-hmm.
Speaker 1 (00:27:19) -
Speaker 0 (00:27:19) - Tell me why should they be one of the first vendors that you book?
Speaker 1 (00:27:23) - You can't get legally married without me. Like that's obviously if you're not, if you're not religious and you're not looking for a religious ceremony, but you want to be legally married, you need a celebrant, um, that is 110%. Yeah.
Speaker 0 (00:27:37) - Yeah. Celebrants can also help with other things though, right? Mm-hmm. like they can help with other vendors and organizing the, the, even just like the wedding day itself. It's not just the like whatever's included in this, like in the package that you've chosen, right? It's not just doing the vows, it's not just all the legal things. There's so much more that you can do.
Speaker 1 (00:27:55) - Yep. Um, so obviously being a celebrant, we get to meet, um, we get to meet a lot of other different vendors in terms of your photographers, videographers. Um, we get to see the work of makeup artists and hairdressers and we get to see the venues. Um, and I think a lot of the time if you are stuck for ideas on that or you're stuck for who might be a, you know, a good vendor to go to, we can always give you tips and hints. Um, we know the areas that if you're looking for something that's a little bit more sort of, um, boho and rustic, you know, go to Warrawong in in Melton, go check that place out. You know, it's a little bit diy, it's perfect. Um, yeah, that's, that's really a big part of it there. We've we've got the connections. Um, even if, I mean I had, I had a couple back in um, April, her makeup artist had to cancel on it and she was like, fuck, I need a makeup artist. And I was like, well hey, there's this person, this person and this person might check these guys out so your celebrates gonna have the hookups.
Speaker 0 (00:28:56) - Oh, that's amazing. Because I wouldn't honestly have ever thought about that. Um, I've been married for a long time, but I wouldn't have even thought like that. Okay, if I wanna start this whole wedding process, right? Like you get engaged and then you figure out where do you wanna get married and then you try and do all the things. Like I don't think the celebrant was the first thing that I booked had I have actually known it probably should have been cuz she probably could have actually teed me up with a whole heap of people that she would've recommended. It would've made it so much easier to do that. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (00:29:24) - I think a lot of the time for a lot of people, the the, um, the venue is the first place that they book, which is understandable, right? I mean, you go into your wedding date knowing what you want your, your day to look like, um, and your venue's a big part of that. Um, and you wanna make sure that you get that space. So I think a lot of the times the venue will always be who they book first. But the other thing that you've gotta consider is that when it comes to your ceremony, people have this thing where the ceremony is like the most boring part of the day and it just needs to get over and done with and whatever. And yet I get it. Nobody wants to sit there for extended amount of times. I don't wanna be up the front talking for an extended amount of time.
Speaker 1 (00:30:05) - Right. I love to talk, but there's a, there's a point where you've gotta stop. Um, the thing that needs to change there. And the thing that I know a lot of celebrants are doing, I'm part of the Celebrant Society, um, and it's all about community over competition, but it's also this big thing where we're sort of party people. Um, and the big movement at the moment is that your ceremony should be the most important part of your day. It's the part where all the legal shit's happening. You're promised to love this person until you are old and gray and for as long as possible. Um, why shouldn't that be celebrated in a big way, um, and in an exciting way. And if you don't take the time to find that celebrant and to book them, you're not necessarily going to end up with the celebrant that's gonna deliver the day that you want in a way that you want it and that feeds us, that gives you that energy, right? It's all about the energy. And um, I think I touched on it a little bit earlier, um, where I mentioned that, you know, I come out of these weddings on a high, when it's a couple that energy is really sort of, you know, use your, use your head words. She's
Speaker 0 (00:31:19) - Using it for people that are listening at the moment. She's just doing a whole lot of hand gestures at me through the computer like a dance coming together.
Speaker 1 (00:31:27) - I hate using the word vibe, but when you meet somebody that you vibe with, it shows in the ceremony that you put together. Yeah,
Speaker 0 (00:31:34) - Yeah. No, it does. I I could totally agree with you there too because I think, yeah, it is this stigma around this the, um, the ceremony being like, okay, it's a boring park, get it outta the way, let's have fun at the reception. And it's always like hanging for the reception. But I mean, the actual wedding is the ceremony. That's why everyone's there is for the actual ceremony. So I love that you are bringing that back and trying to make that fun and make it enjoyable and have a laugh and have a good time and let it not be boring and dull and like everyone just wants it to be over. You want people to, to continue listening. Like tell me more about their story. Like let's keep having a laugh. That was fantastic.
Speaker 1 (00:32:10) - One of the best ceremonies that I wrote, I'm not a gamer, right? I can't game like, it's just, it's not in my blood. But one of the best ceremonies that I wrote was for a local couple who met, um, who met playing a game called Destiny, right? So for those playing at home that aren't gamers, it's like a first person shooter game. Um, and you go through wills and you battle bosses and it's all really fun for gamers, not so fun for me. But this couple had a really great sense of humor, like really dry sense of humor. But I knew that I could have a little bit of fun with this. And so I got to write their story as if it was like the gameplay in action. I was stressing about it all week, like how am I gonna do this? I dunno anything about gaming. Got it together, wrote it and when I delivered it, they were like, that was fucking great. Like, because I knew that they'd have a laugh, like they'd really enjoy if I presented it that way. And there were a couple that I just clicked with because they had that sense of humor and they shared the same energy as me and it just worked. It was next level.
Speaker 0 (00:33:12) - That's, that's cool. That's cool. Yeah. Honestly, I have witnessed your writing abilities. You have read me some scripts before and I was gobsmacked at the language that was coming out. I was like, oh my god, what does that even mean? ? I
Speaker 1 (00:33:24) - Know she sounds like a bogar 95% of the time. And then she's like writing this real sophisticated shit,
Speaker 0 (00:33:29) - Your gifts and this is you expressing your gifts and your personality and your humor and your writing and all that stuff like into the world. So one last question. Hmm. What's one of like the weirdest requests that you've had or anything that you just really stood out to you like, oh, that's different or,
Speaker 1 (00:33:45) - I dunno if I've had a really weird one yet, like I'm still early in the game. I dunno that I've had a really weird one yet. Um, I've had surprise weddings. So, um, I've done a surprise wedding and I've got another one coming up and they were, well the one that I did was really cool. They were open to some different suggestions. So we played, um, I'm gonna call it sim Samsung because that's what he called it and that's what I called it when I was a kid. But, uh, rock paper scissors, we played rock paper scissors, um, in the middle of their ceremony to find out who went first with bows and things like that. And they had some really cool ideas around witness raffles. Um, because it was a surprise ceremony, they had literally told nobody that this was happening. So when it came to their witnesses, they, we were trying to sort of spitball how they'd choose who was gonna sign for them.
Speaker 1 (00:34:31) - Um, and one of the o options that we came up with was a witness raffle. Um, and they ended up deciding, like they'd turned it around later on, he was like, no, I want this specific person. So, but we got to surprise the witnesses through the ceremony as well. And it was like this really emotional moment where they're like, oh shit me, like you're choosing me. Do you want me to do this for you? Um, so I suppose not a weird one, but the surprise weddings are always really good and a lot of fun. Yeah. Um, my, my favorite weddings to do though I've found so far are generally property weddings. Um, and that's just because it's like your couples are in their own environment and for them that adds a whole other emotional level for them as well. Um, and you find that when they are in their own environment, you're dealing with them, you're not dealing with the bride and groom version of them, you are dealing with that person in their home state. It just provides a really nice atmosphere, a really down to earth atmosphere, which is, you know, it's a good thing to work with.
Speaker 0 (00:35:35) - Yeah. That, that's amazing. That's really cool. I like to have that takeaway, you know? Yeah. Like surprise weddings are so much fun. But yeah, I never really thought about the um, I guess the different level of connection that it would be at your own home. That's really, yeah, that's really cool. Oh, I'm excited.
Speaker 1 (00:35:51) - Um, I've done a couple of, of property weddings. I did a backyard wedding for a couple who, um, I suppose on that topic, it was a couple who were getting married in April. Um, they needed a quick turnaround ceremony though because they, or the legal bits, they needed the legal bits done quicker because they, um, were moving to America for his work and they needed to get their visa happening. So they wanted to do just a backyard legals only ceremony. And when you hear the word legals only you think, okay, this is gonna be pretty like straightforward. There's really not gonna be much to it. Um, but because it was in their home, they'd organized, I think it was 30 to 40 of their nearest and dearest. So it was immediate family, um, it was in their home, it was in their backyard. And because it was in their personal space, again, the emotion that you got off of it, off of just illegals only ceremony where I didn't have to share any of their story, but there was that added atmosphere and emotion just from that venue. I suppose that's a big thing. So a big pointer is if you are someone who maybe suffers from anxiety, um, or doesn't like to be the center of attention, don't feel like you need this big spectacular ceremony for it to feel personal and beautiful because we can make that happen. Well I can make that happen for you with illegals only or, or like a little bit more than legals without you having to be 110% in the spotlight, if that makes sense. Does that make sense?
Speaker 0 (00:37:22) - Yeah, that does. Yeah, it does. Yeah, because it is quite overwhelming. I had a really big wedding, like it was about 120 people or something and it was a beautiful day. Don't be wrong, it was a beautiful day, but looking back it's like, did it need to be that much? Did it need to be that grand? Probably not. I probably would've eloped, you know? Yeah. And, and like done the li well not eloped, I shouldn't say that cause God my mom would kill me. But , I think, um, I honestly think like if if Mick and I did it, if we hadn't gotten married by now, we would've had something way smaller or casual and Yeah. It's so, it's so different. I suppose things change. Yeah.
Speaker 1 (00:37:55) - And you can have that, it's about, I mean, it's about setting up the right space to make it personal and special to you. And that's, that's the big thing. You don't have to have that, you don't have to have that big bells and whistle ceremony. It, it can be smaller and it can be, yeah, it can be smaller and still be a really beautiful emotional day for you and your partner. Yeah,
Speaker 0 (00:38:22) - I love that. Yeah. Alright, well to wrap it up, you are love by leash everywhere. Yes. So when we say love by leash, it is love l o v e x leash, l e i s h. So
Speaker 1 (00:38:37) - That's where you can find me on the Insta and the TikTok. Um, definitely I'll love bye as in an X leash. Yes.
Speaker 0 (00:38:46) - I love that. All right, well I'll put all your, all of your links in the show notes anyway. And yeah, like I said at the beginning, you know, if you are in the back, marsh, Ballarat, gilong, western suburbs of Melbourne, anywhere around there, please reach out if you're looking for a celebrant or you know, someone who is, because LE's just gonna make your day extraordinary. I know that. All right doll, we'll wrap this up and I'm in the kitchen for a couple.
Speaker 1 (00:39:09) - Much love. Thanks for having me.